Flying lawyer ants?

Aw man, You got to be kidding me. The ants got bored so they are playing a huge game. Some of them left the city for a few days so they weren't "amidst the city" like the treaty says and "invaded". Since the are allowed to defend against invading ants they made a huge war just for kicks between the defenders and... Ants with lawyers apparently. They are technically within the treaty unless a human is harmed too so I can't do squat. It's awfully annoying because they love the terrain around my house. Apparently it's a very tactical position for ants because a group of the defenders has set up base here. I can't do any of the paperwork I have too... Actually I think I just found the good part about them, I can't do any paperwork thanks to them.
The one time I had a cannon shell fly right through my window. It landed in middle of my open clothes drawer and burned a hole in my favorite shirt. They also got bullets in my cake, im just glad they weren't lead.
Why cant I have a regular, ant-less town where there's normal people with normal pantry doors. I also wish I didn't need a mosquito net to keep airplanes away...
Anyone want to help swat flying ants?

Thank you Jarvis...

"Wake up sire! What's wrong you were yelling." "Oh, I guess I was having a bad dream, sorry for startling you."
Just then I sat upright in bed. "Jarvis, am I still dreaming? Hurry up and pinch me!" "why sire?" "because I'm in my house," I said in a panicked tone." My house was burned by a laser beam Jarvis. I saw it."
"that must have been the dream you were dreaming. Here let me prove it." "ow, your right!"
I wrote down the dialouge from when I woke up word for word because they were the happiest words I have ever heard. That desolate charred city I called home was indeed all a dream! All the fallen troops and villagers. All the murders of the ants. Every one of them was merely in my mind. My obviously twisted and stressed mind but none-the-less the very mid that ruled a large kingdom... My poor villagers.
Anyway, I have to come up with a plan to hinder the ants by any means necessary yet still within the treaty. They simply can't come up with that technology. Especially if that was a vision.
Excuse me now, I have to go dance in the courtyard for joy. Too bad if I haven't changed out of my pajamas yet, the castle dwellers will just have to deal with it.

The end of the world!

I woke up today and I really think the world is ending! The ants somehow and advanced all the way to nuclear technology already and broke the treaty. Towns all around me have been devastated by long range nukes and my own town is in ruins except for a few parts till standing. Charred blackened ruins lay all around me as I walked through the desolate streets evacuated just moments before the ants started their rampage. There was no reason for the attack but the theory was that they were simply power hungry. The destruction was so immense though that I couldn't believe they would do that to a town they wanted to take over. My personal theory was that they simply wanted to crush human civilization and send us back to the stone age... Even though we were only in the medival age.
I have no words strong enough for how sad this makes me. If I had just one wish I would wish this were a dream. The scene below me as I go to sleep in my small hammock that we managed to set up was blurred by the mosquito net but it was still clear to me. A blackened city against a brown horizon with a red sunset. the ruinous city looked more like a firepit magnified than a city. The grass was obviously dead from the explosions and lasers. But the sun was sadder still because even it looked dead. As My eyes started to close from fatigue I looked around at my last faithful servants that hadn't fled far away and I prayed that this would end...

Is it really? Yes!

I woke up today realizing it was the fourth of July and decided to make history. I officially had the first fourth of July parade! It was gloriously colorful, the stable boys put ribbons in the crusader's horses tails and the black knights wore something besides black. I let them wear any color they like since the nation colors weren't red white and blue yet, we didn't have any colors. The ants gave off a 10 gun salute and added an "interesting" aspect. There was a band playing too(but not marching) and even some people on silts! But that was earlier today and so by now I was wishing for some fun. Jarvis must have noticed my bored look and he suggested we light off some of the fireworks he ordered from the "alchies" (our nickname for the alchemist)."It was already a festive day because of the showy parade I had." he said. I stared at him for a few a few seconds then asked, "am I dreaming?" He assured me I wasn't and gave me a funny look back. I really didn't know that there was fireworks in the... Whatever time period this was! I'm so excited, I might write again later but for now I'm going to start making preparations for the fireworks.